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Monthly Archives: March 2013

Kuya May Naiwan Po Kayo

Let’s face it: Some nationalities stink compared to others. It’s a matter of culture.

One time in Singapore, my cousin told a group of men (non Filipino) who fixed her bed, “Kuya, may naiwan po kayo…”
“Ano naiwan nila?” Asked her roommate.
“Yung amoy nila,” she answered.

“Naintindihan ka?” I asked.
“Joke lang syempre. Di naman sila Filipino.”

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Welcome to Dubai, Rhezie!

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Posted by on March 27, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

Tem: Manggagantso

IMG_1401My sister requested me to send her money thru her bank account. I was supposed to send it but she said, “Hintayin mo text ko sa’yo.”

After two days, I received an SMS, “BDO account kuya ####682 close bank at mall ng thu and fri. Thanks kuya love u alang internet eh.”
I knew it was her but to be on the safe side, I replied, “Manggagantso ka!”

A few minutes later, I received a call from the same number, “Kuya?”
“Ah ikaw nga.”
“Anong pinag-sasabi mo? Anong manggagantso? Di ko naiintindihan.”
“Naninigurado lang. Di ba ganun yung mga bogus minsan? Idedeposit na lang?”
“Mga pinag-iiisip mo talaga. O basta ideposit mo na lang.”

 
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Posted by on March 27, 2013 in It's All Relative

 

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Vice Nanay

I called Nanay in Japan, “Happy Birthday!”
“Hindi ka talaga nakakalimot no?”
“Syempre ho. Birthday n’yo pa. Ano plano mamaya?
“Restaurant daw. Kain lang,” Nanay answered.
“Japanese?” I asked. This is 90% possible but I still asked.
“Ay.. Hindi… sa Quiapo. Quiapo,” my nanay answered sarcastically.
“Wow! Para na kayong si Vice Ganda sumagot ah,” I answered laughing out loud.

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Posted by on March 26, 2013 in It's All Relative

 

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Stopover Plan

“Nay, pag tagal tagal pa ni Kuya sa Dubai, pwede tayo dumalaw dun kapag malamig,” Tem told our Nanay.
“Basta ayoko ng may stopover ha? Natatakot ako sa eroplano,” she answered.
“Stopover agad? Agad-agad!?” Tem answered.

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Happy Birthday, Nay… I love you.

 
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Posted by on March 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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My Boss Had a Question

Screen Shot 2013-03-24 at 9.48.03 PM“Orlee, how do you spell donkey?” My boss asked. She was trying to write a business letter.
“Donkey?” I asked.
“Not donkey – D O N K E Y. I know how to spell THAT!”
I laughed, I was wondering why would she write an ass in a business letter, “You mean the German thanks!? DANKE. – D A N K E.”

 
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Posted by on March 24, 2013 in Work Anecdotes

 

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Miggy New Outlook

Miggy“Kamusta si Miguel” I asked Tem.
“Mabait na sya sa school.”
“Hindi na sya nanunusok ng ballpen?”
“Hindi na. Matagal nanag hindi ganun,” my sister answered, “Takot na nga maleyt ngayon.”

Lolo! Dali! Maleleyt na ako!

 
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Posted by on March 21, 2013 in It's All Relative

 

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Tweet of the Week: Legs vs Ass

My niece tweeted this:

Me: nakakainis kayo, ang hahaba ng legs niyo. Ba’t ako lang panget legs!?
Pong: ok lang yan, baka kasi ikaw lang malaki pwet.

 
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Posted by on March 16, 2013 in It's All Relative

 

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