Happy Birthday Paula!
Happy Birthday Paula!
In the flat, when someone helps Ronald with the cooking, that person would always boast the thing that he or she did.
“Oh ako ang nag-saing,” Julius would say.
“Wow, sarap naman ng saing mo,” I would answer.
“Oh si Bing ang naghalo ng ulam,” Ronald would say.
“Wow Bing! Galing naman ng pagkakahalo mo,” I would say.
So when Ronald said, “Oh si Burn ang nag-hiwa n’yang baboy.”
I would obviously say, “Burn, sarap naman ng hiwa mo.”
During our all-Filipino lunch session, Roger told us, “Buti pa kayo na-e-enjoy n’yo pa ‘yang mga alcohol sessions n’yo.”
We asked him, “Bakit pare, ikaw ba?”
“Sawa na ako d’yan!” he told us, “Dati kasi sa Pinas, halos araw-araw akong umiinom.”
“Bago ko nga nakilala misis ko, parang wala nang direksyon ang buhay ko eh, halos wala na akong ginawa kundi uminom. Parang nag-sawa na talaga ako sa buhay.”
“Talaga?” we asked, “Ilang taon ka ba nun?”
Since we are on the topic of the new guy, might as well be on a roll…
I found him in the bathroom during my regular sneaking to the bathroom lunchtime toothbrush. He asked, “You brush your teeth?”
“How many times?” he followed up.
I raised my hands and signed three fingers.
After this very discussion I hurriedly went to Roger, “Pare! Tinanong ako kung ilang beses araw ako nag -tu-toothbrush. Atleast alam nila na toothbrush ‘yun. Akala ko ang itatanong: What is that?”
Becoming immune to the new guy’s smell, I commented, “Infairness, ‘di na s’ya nangangamoy,” to Zinnia and Roger.
“Oo nga,” Zinnia answered.
“Hoy!” Roger screamed, “Nangangamoy pa rin s’ya!”
This is the first time Roger said something nasty towards a colleague so Zinnia and I were shocked.
“Ano amoy n’ya?” asked Zinnia.
“Ano eh….” Roger stuttered.
“Ano!?” I asked.
“Parang…” Roger being hesitant.
“Paa?” I said.
“Kilikili?” Asked Zinnia.
And it went on and on…
“Hininga pagka gising?”
Roger laughed, “Sobra naman kayo!”
“Eh ang tagal mo sumagot eh.”
Funny thing that my flatmates took it seriously that everyone wore nothing but shirts, put their feet on their seats and drank vodka straight up. The party was just brewing when I left them at that and went to bed.
Almost at my REM cycle, I heard people screaming:
“Putang-ina! Bakit kayo papayag!? Upakan na natin!!”
“Huy! Tama na ‘yan!”
“Lasing ka lang! Tangnaka!”
“HOY! TAMA NA!”
“Guys! Tama na ‘yan!”
“WAG KAYONG PUMAYAG! FUCK SHIT!”
They had a rumble. Tondo theme certified.
The next morning we told DJ, “Deej, congrats! I heard successful daw ang Tondo-themed party mo kagabi?”
Bing told me that during her college days in UST, her Rizalist Jose Rizal Subject Professor asked them on their first day of class, “Nasaan si Rizal?” and left it at that.
The whole class mumbled and speculated, “Nasa-Calamba?” “Nasa Luneta?” “Nasa-Intramuros?” which went on for 10 minutes.
After the brain bending question, the professor screamed, “NASA PUSO!” while touching his heart.